ACTIVITY 14. READ THE FOLLOWING TEXT AND MATCH THE HEADLINES GIVEN IN THE BOX TO THE APPROPRIATE PARAGRAPH. How to be a better friend
d) Enjoy it
e) Don't demand too much
f) Be a good listener
a) Be realistic
b) Set some standards
c) Be yourself
1. Instead of giving endless advice learn to listen more. Listening is an underestimated skill, and it is easy to forget when you are worrying about other people's problems. How many times do we say, «Oh yea, that happened to me and ...» before we give the other person a chance to explain what happened to them. Sometimes a friend may just want to talk something over with someone else to sort things out in their own mind - so listen hard to what they are saying, and try to offer advice only when you think they are asking for it.
2. We often feel we have been let down by a friend at some point in our life. Perhaps they let out a secret we trusted them to keep under wraps, or suddenly sided with the opposition during an argument. Nobody is perfect, so try to have realistic expectations. Friendships don't develop over- night, they deepen over time as you begin to trust one another. Don't place unrealistic demands on your friendship.
3. Everyone wants to be liked, but trying too hard to be popular shows. So stop worrying whether people like you or not, just get on with the business of being you. There can be a great temptation to make people like us by changing our personality to suit others. However, this can make you extremely unhappy in the long run. Of course, not everyone is going to think you are great, but the chances are the ones who don't like the way you are, aren't going to make particularly good friends anyway.
4. Friendships are based on trust, and if that's betrayed, the whole relationship breaks down. If you want people to be trustworthy and honest with you then you are going to have to offer the same standards in return.
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